Baby Love

Nothing in the world compares with the joy of motherhood. Watching a person that you created discover the world in all its glory for the first time is the biggest thrill. I cannot even describe the emotion that swells up in me every time she reaches out for me, or snuggles me with her soggy baby kisses, or laughs at something I have done.

For the first several months, it was hard to even grasp that she was mine. The birth was so difficult, we almost lost her, and then the recovery from surgery was so hard on my body. I was exhausted all the time. I saw life through a haze and all my emotions were blunt and blurry. And life was anything but simple. We moved, school began with all its craziness, I was thrust into a very demanding role while my muscle floor was still numb and healing and had to learn music with vision problems and sing with vocal problems... and then audition season, the Christmas season, taking over for a full-time faculty member, Ryan's impending graduation and final paperwork... you get the idea.

And then one morning I went in to get her, and she smiled that humongous smile of hers and reached up to me, and I knew that she was mine. And I melted from the crown of my head all the way down to my toes. And everything that I had been through was worth it for that one priceless moment of feeling her arms go around my neck as I scooped her out of the crib.